RIT love story began with a snowball fight and a tackle that sparked a four-decade-long relationship

Chili, New York – For Stacey (Wolff) Incorvaia ’83 and AJ Incorvaia ’85, love didn’t begin with fireworks or grand romantic gestures. It began with small steps—quite literally. As an RIT student in the early ’80s, Stacey used to take the long route to the water fountain just for a glimpse of a certain computer science major whose quiet intensity caught her eye.

“I used to walk to the farthest water fountain just to see him,” Stacey recalled, laughing.

AJ, just as focused on his textbooks as she was on catching his attention, still noticed. “She was so cute in that blue suit,” he remembered.

Read also: Variety Magazine recognizes RIT as one of the Top Film Schools in North America for its innovative programs and industry impact

At first glance, the two couldn’t have been more different. AJ was reserved and focused on his studies, while Stacey brought energy and charisma to every room she entered. But fate—or perhaps Cupid armed with a snowball—had other plans.

The turning point came during RIT’s Cold Hands & Warm Hearts Winter Weekend in 1982. After a football game played on snowy ground, students launched into a spontaneous snowball fight. In the chaos and laughter, AJ made a bold move and tackled Stacey into the snow.

“My mother told me to never let anybody get the better of me, and I wasn’t going to allow him to,” Stacey said, recalling how she retaliated by knocking AJ to the ground herself.

That snowy scuffle marked the beginning of a connection that would deepen over time into a partnership spanning more than 40 years. The university that brought them together would also provide the space and support to grow both individually and as a couple.

“AJ was my rock when it came to math classes,” Stacey said. “I couldn’t have passed stats without him.”

In return, AJ credits Stacey with expanding his world beyond the computer lab. “She was my social manager and alarm clock. Left to my own devices, I’d have stayed in the dorms, but Stacey made sure we had fun. I think that’s what made the experience special.”

Their love wasn’t without its tests. After graduation, Stacey’s co-op assignments took her from Chicago to Boston, and eventually into a bustling retail career in New York City. Meanwhile, AJ stayed behind at RIT to complete his degree. In the days before cell phones or email, staying connected was no small task.

“We didn’t have cell phones or the Internet back then,” AJ said. “Maintaining a long-distance relationship took effort and commitment, but she was worth it.”

Read also: Supervisor Bill Reilich shares full details of the 2025 Memorial Day Parade and Remembrance Ceremony planned in the Town of Greece

They married in 1989, and their careers eventually led them to Northborough, Massachusetts, where they now live and raised their three children.

Even as life pulled them in different directions, skiing became a shared passion that brought them back together again and again. Stacey, who had been skiing since age three, made it clear early on that this would be part of their life.

“My mother grilled AJ about skiing the first time he came home with me,” Stacey said. “She didn’t ask about his major or career plans—she asked if he could handle Vermont slopes.”

AJ, who had only been skiing twice, took on the challenge with characteristic determination. Years later, the couple’s skiing adventures have included trips to Vermont, Utah, and Western Canada with their children, now ages 33, 30, and 28.

“It’s something that brought us closer as a couple and as a family,” AJ said. “Even today, when we hit the mountain together, it feels like the perfect blend of adventure and connection.”

Today, AJ works as a senior vice president at Siemens, and Stacey runs a knitting shop while actively serving on several local boards. Despite their busy lives and evolving careers, their bond remains strong, grounded in mutual respect, shared memories, and a daily commitment to each other.

“Every day, you wake up and decide to keep choosing each other,” Stacey said. “That choice, and the effort you put into it, is what builds a lasting partnership.”

From snowball fights to ski trips and everything in between, the Incorvaias’ love story is a reminder that some of the best relationships are built not on perfection, but on persistence, playfulness, and the willingness to keep choosing each other—day after day, year after year.